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sushi & christmas
There and Back Again
Stuff I figure you might possibly want to know.
She is gone 
11th-Feb-2007 11:11 pm
sushi & christmas
This evening, just after my brother Jim had left for home in Brooklyn, my mother passed away.

My brother Rick and I had just moved the table with the flowers and Photos of my father to a spot where she could see them if she came to for any bit of time and we were trying to tell her that it was OK to pass. I told her that my father was waiting for her probably dressed to go out and playing an organ wondering when she would be ready to go. Her eyes opened slightly, her breath slowed, I went to her side and held her hand and she died. It was as if she had come to a sudden clarity of mind and realized that instead of being trapped in a dyeing body surrounded by he children that were sad for her plight she could be with my dad: the man she loved and respected no matter how pissed off she got at him. This was in true form to her character. Poor Jim had to turn around and come back.

Just today my neighbor was telling me about when he moved into the house next to us in '79. His wife was pregnant and he was stuck away at a job, he worked for sparrows point and the like. My mother seeing her new pregnant neighbor was possibly in need, told her that we had 2 freezers full of food and that they could have anything they needed. She did not care that our new neighbors were one of the few blacks in the neighborhood, she had shed her prejudice of her background and parents. She had gone from riding trolly cars as a girl and not giving it a second thought that the black had to ride in the back to thinking of sharing what ever she had with strangers that had just moved in next door that happened to be black. There are many of her generation that still don't have that. Life is not only about who you are it is about who you were and did you improve: she did. She had may faults, as I have shared over the years, but she had virtues as well.

We official make arrangements tomorrow, but the rough out is 1 day viewing at Evan's in Parkville MD and then cremation on Wednesday.
12th-Feb-2007 05:07 am (UTC)
sigh....I'm sorry, hon :(
12th-Feb-2007 06:23 am (UTC)
12th-Feb-2007 12:43 pm (UTC)
12th-Feb-2007 01:15 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope she is indeed with her beloved husband now.
12th-Feb-2007 01:30 pm (UTC) - thank you
I can see you Still_Asking is fond of you. As I was typing to you my 22lb Tabby, Caster Magnifico, petitioned for my lap. He is unsure exactly what has happened, but I think he knows the nice grand ma person is gone and he commiserates with me: as do the Siamese and the dogs. So we are supposed to be superior? Somethings doesn't sound right to me about that. Anyway, thanks.
12th-Feb-2007 01:49 pm (UTC)
I'm so very sorry, but am glad that her suffering be over. *Hugs*
12th-Feb-2007 03:22 pm (UTC)
I'm very sorry to hear this -- condolences.
12th-Feb-2007 11:02 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry. At least it sounds like she went very quickly.
12th-Feb-2007 11:22 pm (UTC)
My deepest sympathies, dear. I know there's little I can say during this time of sorrow, and all the flurry of preparations. I can't make it better, much as I'd like to. I pray that the good and gracious Lord will comfort and strengthen you and your family, and give you His peace.
13th-Feb-2007 02:40 am (UTC)
My condolences.
13th-Feb-2007 06:58 am (UTC)
My sincerest condolences. I know the pain of losing both of one's parents.

I have many regrets in my life. One of the worse is that my mother passed away alone. I truly envy you the comfort you were able to give your mother in her passing. Reading your recollections of her passing actually brought me to tears. I sincerely wish I could have done the same thing for my own mom.

Were it not for the mutual animosity we have shared in the past, I would offer you a hug. I suppose it is the thought that counts after all.
13th-Feb-2007 11:24 am (UTC) - Thank you
I will not lie and suggest that there is no animosity, but that does not keep me from appreciating you words.

I am sorry about your mother passing happening alone, but at least that part is over for both of them. What ever you believe or don't believe, they have gone on to the next stage and no longer have the pains of this world.

13th-Feb-2007 02:11 pm (UTC) - I just found out
It is never easy. Comfort. She sounded a lot like my mom.
14th-Feb-2007 07:12 pm (UTC)
Sincere condolences from Ohio. I heard through the FOAF network and thought I should let differences go in the face of your grief.
14th-Feb-2007 11:14 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry. I know what it's like to lose your mother, especially one you had a complicated relationship with.

In the next few weeks someone will say something hurtful to you under the cover of being sympathetic. Steel yourself for it.
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