Overt the last days I have leaned somethings and some new things have happened involving

The things I have learned:



1. My mother neglected to tell me that she was in the 4th and final stage of Non Small Cell lung cancer.


2. She also neglected to tell me that Non Small Cell lung cancer is very hard to cure and that it does not respond to Chemotherapy.


3. Finally she neglected to make it clear that to me that the life expectancy for her stage and type of cancer was between 6 months and 2 five years at most, with an average of 2 years from her date of diagnosis.

Now to the things that have happened.

Friday her heart rate was at 120 bpm and my brother and sister in law took her to the hospital and she was put on a heart floor.

Saturday her condition improved some with her heart at about 90 bpm.

Some time Sunday breathing elevated to about 150 % of normal due to one of her lungs have some sort of blockage that may be pneumonia in the lower part of the lung past the tumor.

Sunday evening my brother, sister still_asking and I visited her, spoke with doctors went over her statement of DNR and on air tubes. Trying to balance it against the fact that there was a procedure that they could due that might call for am air tube during and a short time after the procedure. Since the hospital stated clearly that they could and would remove the tube at our discretion we decided that this was not a "life sustaining" measure, which is our understanding of what she does not want, but a life saving that could give her comfort through the improvement of her breathing, which would seem to be inline with her living will.

Sunday night at about 8 pm she was moved to the ICU where the procedure can be done. They changed her from a nose oxygen tube to a mask and there was marked improvement, so the throat tube may not be needed assuming they still want to do the procedure.

Let none of you be fouled

1. For all reasonable used of the words my mother is dyeing.


2. Her life is now measured in days or weeks.


3. Yet again her denial and avoidance of uncomfortable emotional events have let me have no time to prepare for what is coming.


4. I love my mother.
   
   Now I am off to her apt to find papers etc.
   
   Death, Be Not Proud